Not long ago, a TV journalist posed the following question on a couple of Danish expat websites: “What’s it like dating Danes? Danes love to flirt for the fun of it, so don’t read too much into that.” So I took a look at the comments you made and thought I’d add my five cents in the hope that I can encourage you all to ‘hang in there’ when you’re ready to throw in the towel. Plus Danes really aren’t used to being forward, so they just feel things out for a (very) long time.
Play your own game, not theirs, and if you don’t catch them, then go and find another.This reminds me of an American guy who took a Danish girl to a castle for lunch.He then asked whether he could cook her dinner, but she refused because it would “feel too much like a date”.He then replied: “So what did our castle trip mean then?Unlike us Antipodeans, Danes aren’t used to freely laughing at themselves – especially around people they don’t know very well.This could have something to do with the fact you’re not a Dane.
It’s what I like to call the ‘Fascination and the Foreigner Complex’.
It’s exciting, new and novel to be with someone from abroad, but after a few dates, when the novelty wears off, it becomes a pain to speak English, and they realise any kind of commitment may mean moving away from their beloved Denmark.
They have a hyperactive sense of independence that means the commitment aspect can create resentment.
Honestly, if you’re just out to “put a ring on it”, then I suggest you try a more ‘old-fashioned’ country such as New Zealand or Australia.
Dating doesn’t come naturally to Danes, so they put a lot of pressure on themselves to get it right.
Often they act rather seriously because they’re worried about losing face.